On second Wednesdays of the month, I lead a group of women friends who are engaged in conversations about life purpose and intention. This week our conversation was about what we really want. We looked at the different aspects of our lives: home, health, family, romance and friends, work, fun and leisure, learning, money, spirituality.
None of us had any trouble coming up with material things: be thinner, be fitter, get a new car, get my rugs cleaned, figure out a better solution for the litter box. But we all had a lot more trouble coming up with desires in other realms. One woman commented that when she wrote about what she needed, she could think of a lot of things but when it came to desires, her negative filters (you can't have that, we can't afford that, don't be silly, who do you think you are) all jumped in her face. The other women concurred.
And we got to talking about whether this is a male/female difference. Do women focus on what they need and suppress what they want while men focus on what they want and suppress what they need? We had a rich conversation and then tried the exercise again. It was still tough to move out of what we don't want and into what we do although we came up with a few things.
How easily are you able to express what you desire?