As I said in the last post, I changed most of my life in the early years of my sobriety. My 10-year addictive relationship with the man I thought I'd be with forever twindled through 10 sober months before he made the commitment I'd pleaded for to a woman 23 years his junior. I found a new tenure-track teaching job but after 4 years I couldn't do the politics and the pettiness anymore. I moved back home to Oregon, both to be with family and to live someplace fresh and clean, me and the environment. I started a new career and built a business, I got creativity into my life and started painting and writing seriously. I stayed out of romantic relationships. It was easier and I believe healthier for me that way.
I have a really good life. I have a great apartment, great friends, the studio I've always dreamed of, books that I'm writing and publishing. Good challenges, lots of rewards. I'm not a big fish but I'm a pretty happy fish. And I still struggle with addiction. To sugar. To overeating. To overworking. To over-consuming in general.
So I've begun asking. Is this an environment that will support me in further healing from addiction? And the answer is coming back perhaps not quite. I'm not sure where this inquiry is going to take me. I'll keep you posted.