Today is Day 90 of my adventure in Bright Line Eating. I've lost 46 pounds (as of last Monday). This is an astonishing loss for me, a miracle of healthy eating and no snacks, nada, zip, zero. I eat three meals a day about 5 hours apart and then if I get hungry, I wait until the next meal.
Like AA, it's a simple program and like AA, it's not always easy. I have a lot of old food habits that are showing up. Most recently, I noticed that if I go out for errands or the studio or for lunch with a friend, I want to eat when I come back, even if I've just had lunch. Clearly it isn't about hunger but a conditioned response: come home, get a snack. Probably goes all the way back to grade school days.
But I'm also accruing new experiences. I've been to two writing retreats now without snacking. In the not so long ago, I would have been eating candy all day long at these retreats. Now I'm learning to take care of myself in other ways: walking, coloring, playing cards, shifting my writing from one subject to another. It sounds really simple again and sometimes it is. Other times, it's hard, very hard, and I want to just eat something sweet and be done with the need.
Those old needs, those old habits are so well worn in my brain. What keeps me food sober is my knowledge that those old grooves can wither if I stay in the new habits. Here's to the new habits.